Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Mom's been pretty moody lately and had been having weird mood swings. Just in case anyone's wondering, she's not 'over it' yet and she can get teary just watching an advertisement on TV (yeah... I know it's lame)... She was never like this before and she used to scoff at her best friend who always cries whenever she watched/ read anything touching. Now, simple little things can bring on mom’s tears... sometimes when she is in the shopping centre, she feels a pang of envy when she sees parents pushing their baby in a stroller, or when she sees a cute jumper/ bib/ cap for little boys but she can't buy it ‘cos there's no one to buy it for.

To make things worse, the Singapore government is trying to encourage young couples to have more babies 'cos we have an aging population problem here, so now there are heaps of television programs during primetime that are all about babies.. i.e. Infant care, a drama serial that revolves around a guy taking care of his niece (something like the movie '3 men and a baby'), competitions on who has the cutest baby boy/ baby girl, the list goes on... (Yeah.. just rub more salt on the wound, would you??)

We are not sure if it's due to the new medication that she was prescribed with or if it's because her 'supposedly' due date (around 9 Dec), if she hadn't had the miscarriage, is drawing nearer. She has watched the belly of her colleague get bigger (her colleague's baby boy is due about 2 weeks before Lucas) and mom finds it really hard to listen to the colleague talking to other people about her baby's nursery, the baby shower, etc without feeling that lump in her throat.

Mom is considering if she should take leave on the first 2 weeks in December and probably retreat to some deep, dark hole so that she can wallow in self-pity and hide from rest of the world. (Gee.. I better start digging that hole for her soon if we need to complete it by Dec)...

Oh, and I miss my baby brother too...


Girl Girl Hamster said...

Oh dear Huskee.. Please take care of your mom. I think it'll be nice to take some time off for herself too.

~ Girl girl

Bee Bee said...

Dear Huskee

*Big hugs from me and my Jiejie to your Mum*

PS: My Jiejie is a FengShui enthusiast and she can read ppl's chart to find out about timing and why things happen. If your mum wants to know can let us know k? FOC of course :D

Bee Bee

Aki and Poopie said...

oh huskee :(.. we don't know what to say.. manang lost an elder sister too. but you see, some things happen for a reason. when that sister came to, maybe manang isn't here right now.

we are sorry for your mum and little brother. but we have to believe that there is a very good reason why this happened. in the end, i know everything will work out for the best. let's just stay strong for her, okay?

try your best to be a very good boy, and tell hershey to be a good girl too. for now, all you can do is to make her feel that she is well loved and that she is the best mom in the world. We KNOW she is.

we love you huskee's mom!

Aki, Poopie, Heinz and thei manang

♥Mona + Prissy + Angel Weenie♥ said...

Oh my hear Huskee. Your Mommy needs all the loving she can get right now. The Mommy said it is normal for your Mommy to still have these feelings and that she should not worry about it. She will heal when the time is right. A little time off would be wonderful in December but tell her not to hide in a hole just to cuddle with you and Hershey and that will do the trick. The Mommy wishes she could come right over there to hold your Mommy & comfort her but you know we are praying your Mom feels better soon.

Love...Mona & thr Mommy too!!.

Peanut said...

Time off might be good but hiding in a hole won't. Tell her to take time off and take you to the park and out and about and love on you guys a ton.

NAK and The Residents of The Khottage Now With KhattleDog! said...

I think the two of woo need to give her LOTS and LOTS of extra love!

My mom is one of those things happen fur reasons kind of humans - I'm not sure that helps your mom much but I wanted to paw it out there anyway -

Maybe she needs to khome share my nice khool air!


BrandytheGreat said...

Oh boy..
This doesn't sound too good!
Huskee! Please make sure your momma is alright! Maybe she should go on a vacation and enjoy herself? Whatever it is, I don't think the big hole is appropriate!

Lady Kaos said...

Big hugs to your mom. Mom can't imagine having to watch those commercials! That would be horrible! Mom is feeling much better today thank goodness!

Molly the Airedale said...

Make sure you give your mom lots of attention, Huskee! She needs your warm furry body to hug and squeeze!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

Snowy and Crystal said...

awww dear Huskee,

give your mommy tones of kisses from us and also send her our mommy's hug

tell her not to worry and not to lose hope

There is sometime when mommy feels like staying away/hiding from everyone. But we don't let her do it...we only allow her to take some time for herself, recharge her energy and get back to the strong mommy..Don't dig that hole for for your mommy Huskee

Hey pal, how about this:
your mommy spends the comming days doing some other stuff that she likes - keeping her mind off the thing that upsets her? You can join (we are sure that you can make her smile BIG)

wet licks

Maltese Paws


Moco said...

No one ever gets over the loss of a child. What your mom is feeling is not abnormal. She should not beat herself up over how she feels and she need not listen to people who tell her how to feel. No one knows how she really feels but her. She will probably always get a sad around December.
Taking some time off might be a good idea, but digging a hole is not. Unless it is out in the yard and you are burying a bone.
What medication is she taking? Sometimes meds can cause a wide range of side effects.
We will keep all of you in our circle of healing vibes.

Pedro said...

Oh Huskee, my mom and I are sorry your mom is so sad. My mom is still sad about the death of her nephew's wife last month. She can only imagine how hard this is for your mom. Unfortunately it's going to take what it takes... There are no rules for grieving and your mom shouldn't beat herself up for being sad. Maybe instead of hiding in a hole you mom can take some time off and do something special instead. Make a good memory. We say paws for your mom and hope some day soon you mom will be blessed with happiness.

Pedro & my mom

Two Schnauzers from New England said...

Hi, Huskee -

Please take good care of your Mom. She needs lots of healing kisses and paw hugs. We will keep her in our thoughts.

Love -

Hershey and Kaci

Hammer said...

Dear Huskee, Hershey, Shane and Mark

Sorry I haven't been visiting. Mum is very, very busy and unfortunately this is going to be life for a while.

There was a segment on the radio the other day about miscarriages and I was going to tell you, so your post is certainly relevant. Mum wrote down the words and here they are: When hoomans say "It's okay you'll have another baby" or "There must have been something wrong", etc. etc., these words are very damaging and hurtful to the parents and these words FAIL TO RECOGNISE THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THE LOSS.

There is nothing wrong with your mum. Her behaviour is NORMAL.

Mum feels the same way when people dismiss the death of animals by saying words about rainbow bridge etc. These words FAIL TO RECOGNISE THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THE LOSS. For some hoomans like mum, the significance of the loss is HUGE.

Grief has nothing to do with weakness or strength. It has to do with love.

These are the words in an email mum received the other day too: "There were times when it was normal to grieve for a life time and it was normal for people to have their nervous system destroyed by shock and/or loss; it was even quite acceptable that one could die of a broken heart. But today in our society we fly from one event to another and we are supposed to bounce back, no matter what. It’s almost out of fashion to grieve. All people seem to say to each other is ‘you have to move on’, which is only possible when it’s possible. Some connections are so strong that ‘moving on’ is not in the books."

We hope that these words will help your mum and dad. Please give them lots of hugs and licks from us.

Love from Hammer
PS The next hooman who tells mum her hair is falling out from stress, completely ignoring mum's grief, might get a punch in the nose and I'm going to bite them in the crotch. (only joking, I think).

Lorenza said...

Hi, Huskee!
I agree with our friends. Time off sounds like a good idea but not hidding in a hole!
I am sure you and Hershey are taking good care of her!
Kisses and hugs

Lacy said...

w00f's Huskee and hershey, me has thought on this and this is what me thinks...ur mama and daddy too, r gonna always think of angel baby lucas...and for some reason during christmas, we always think of our loved ones that r not with us in person anymore..and that makes it very very hard..ur mama works with ladies thats getting ready to give birth, and she cant help feeling the way she does...time off would b good for her, but i am just afraid that she would stay in the apartment/house and think about only that, and that would make it hopes me is saying this right, lol after all me iz a dog..mayb ur mama and daddy could plan a trip, just for them alone...that they always wanted to visit...or something they always wanted to do...

b safe and our love,
~rocky and company~

Hammer said...

Hi Huskee

I've been thinking, and if your mum wants to hide in a dark hole, she's entitled to do it, but I know you'll be in the dark hole with her, kissing her and loving her, and Hershey will be in the dark hole making a nuisance of herself, and everyone who loves your mum will be in the dark hole with her, holding her and loving her, and if we lived closer, we'd be in the dark hole with you all too.

We're thinking of you all.

Love from Hammer

Myeo said...


It will be nice if your mom could spend some time with your dad during that two weeks. That will be a good idea.

Boy n Baby

The Musketeers said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Musketeers said...

Sissy is finally back! We missed you , although its only for a short while (:
Oh Huskee & Hershey's mum ! do take care alright ! We don't want you to fall sick or such !
Lots of kisses from the 3 of us *

Loves & kisses ,
Three Musketeers

-The Mullin Clan's Mommy- said...

Hiya Huskee,

I thinks yur mommy needs lots of kissies & hugs from woo right now!

-da boys, Cosmos & Juneau-

duo_disaster said...

Dear Huskee,

We are so not good at words but here's a warm *HUG* for your Dad & Mum... Lucas is well-remembered.

Please also remind Hershey to be a good girl, yeh?

~ RG

i said...

We understand how it feels to lose loved ones. Each of us deal with our grieves differently. And you are a good boy, Huskee. Wanting to help her dig a hole shows your understanding and support. Hugs to you and your mom. Our thoughts are with you.

A&S said...

take good care of your mom. give her lots of love and cuddles.