I am enjoying a rare moment of cuddle/ ear-rub that is caught on camera. I am normally quite 'camera-shy' and will try to look away just at the exact moment mama presses the shutter. I tell you that can get her soooo upset.. heehee...

I want to share with you the encounter that mama and papa had last night. After work, they met for dinner before going home together and as it was late already, they decided to just have fast food at KFC (*yummy*) in a shopping mall near to mama's office. When they were almost finished, mama felt something brush against her back, so she spun around in her seat (she had her handbag behind her on the chair) and saw a man do a u-turn and walk quickly out of the shop. She immediately checked inside her bag for her purse (I was told by a 'reliable source' that it costs more than everything in her bag put together, both figuratively and literally). It had sentimental value 'cos papa bought it for her about 2 months ago as a present for giving him Lucas. Now that Lucas is in heaven, the sentimental value of the purse became even higher.

Anyway, her purse was still there but her phone's gone! Papa stood up and went after the guy (mama wanted me to add that when dad was preparing to go after the guy, he was still chewing on a piece of chicken bone/skin. I reckon that it must be his favourite part.. Hahaha..) Well, papa shouted twice at the guy to stop and as the mall was still crowded at that time, the guy did not try to run for it since it'd attract too much attention.. Papa caught up with him easily, took the phone back and gave him some HBO words. And you know what the funny part is? That guy actually offered papa his gold chain and mobile phone in exchange for letting him off. Papa found it quite amusing but he of course rejected his 'offer' and gave him more HBO words...

Mama was quite scared/worried during the entire time cos she was worried that the other guy could've been armed and he'd hurt papa. I only wish I was there at that time too so that I can give that guy a bite with my crooked teefies on where it'd hurt him most.. *insert evil laugh*

I was tagged by Happy for the Unspectacular Quirks Meme. I wasn’t too sure about it at the beginning because it’d mean that I’ll be sharing some pretty embarrassing things about myself!

Here are the rules:

1. Link to the one who tagged you. List the rules on your blog.
2. Tell about 6 unspectacular quirks of yours.
3. Tag some blogger friends with links. Leave a comment on their blog to let them know they've been tagged.

... and below are 6 of my unspectacular quirks:

1. I like hard boiled eggs… only the egg-yolk though. Please remove the egg-white before you mix them in my food


2. I like to nibble the tips off grandmama’s potted plants (** Shhh.. don’t tell her that it was me!!**)


3. After my baths, I like to ‘towel’ dry myself on the hooman’s big big bed…


4. Whenever one of the hoomans come home, I will never fail to stop whatever I am doing and I will carry a toy in my mouth and bring it over to them


5. I like getting the insides of my ears cleaned


6. I prefer the company of hoomans more than that of dogs… (especially after I have successfully trained the hoomans to give me belly/ ear rubs and/ or dispense treats!!)
   

I will now tag Ronak, Sparky and Kirby to play the game...

Sweet lil' Asta gave me an award! The Big Red Bow is an award of special recognition, for always reminding us to wish each other well and cheer each other on. They are like a bow that ties all of us together.

I want to give this award to ALL my friends, especially the pups and their hoomans who stood by my mom and gave us so much support and words of encouragement during mom’s recent miscarriage. It helped us a whole lot through the bleak period and we are still here because of you. So, all of you, please give accept this award from me! *hugs*

Last week, my pal Petey was advertising for a female friend here and so far, he's gone on 3 exciting dates. Petey is a dashing 5 year old Cairn Terrier living in the West Village of New York City and he is one real romantic guy who knows how to treat his ladies right. Check out his first date with Gaia, his second date with Asta Marie and the third date with Abby.

My little hammie sister Moosie, got wind of his pawsonal ad and started bugging me non-stop to subtlely drop hints to Petey. I had to break it gently to her that Petey won't date outside his species. Moreover, he lives with a kitty cat named Mica and both Petey and I are concerned about how much Mica may like Moosie.. it maybe a bit too much for comfort. See the below message that Mica left in my CBox.. Hehehe...




Here's little Mica... doesn't he look handsome? Maybe Moosie would like to date him instead??

Here's little Moosie for you Petey, in case you change your mind. Although I'm not sure if she likes having salt and pepper sprinkled on her... *evil laugh*...

So girls, go over and say 'hi' to Petey... I'm sure he'd love to hear from you lovelies!! (This, of course excludes you, Baby since you are already married to me)... And don't forget to let me know where you'd like to go for our din din.

I was given the 'Arte y Pico' not just once, not twice but THRICE!! One was given by my good friends, Rudolf & Goofy, another one by Mango, the little Maltese AND the third by my wife Baby and her brother Boy! (Impawtant note: Baby even said on her blog that she gave me this award 'for being the greatest hubby in the whole wide entire doggi-niverse.' Isn't she the best-est? THANK YOU everyone for this honour!!

Here are the details of the award: - 'This award was created to be given to bloggers who inspire others with their creativity and their talents, also for contributing to the blogging world in whatever medium. When you receive this award it is considered a special honor." (Extracted from Origin, Sen-Chan & Tom)

Here is the info on the award:
This award was created to be given to bloggers who inspire others with their creativity and their talents, also for contributing to the blogging world in whatever medium.When you receive this award it is considered a special honor. Once you have received this award, you are to pass it on to 5 others.

The Rules:
1) You have to pick 5 blogs that you consider deserve this award for their creativity, design, interesting material, and also contribute to the blogger community, regardless of language.
2) Each award has to have the name of the author and also a link to his or her blog to be visited by everyone.
3) Each award-winner has to show the award and put the name and link to the blog that has given her or him the award itself.
4) Award-winners and the one who has given the prize have to show the link of "Arte y Pico"blog , so everyone will know the origin of this award.
5) To show these rules.

Many of my friends have already received this award and I want to make sure no one is missed out!! I give this award to Charlie, Moco (I am especially inspired by the post on 'The Poop-o-Matic'), Lady Kaos, Boo Boo and T-man.

I also want to share with you that mom had a major meltdown at work on Tue. One of her colleagues (that very same one whom I mentioned in one of my earlier posts that told her that it was time to 'move on and get over it') started talking very excitedly about one of her friend was in hospital and in labour and her cervix was not dilating and there was contractions, and the pain, and the nausea and blah blah blah... After putting up for about 3 minutes, mom just 'lost it' and walked out of the office. She sat at some smoking corner for about 45mins looking like an absolute fool as she was trying hard to hold back her tears (cos when she walked out, she did not bring anything with her, including tissue, and being the vainpot that she is, she had mascara on... Imagine this, woman sitting alone with mascara running down her face... Not a pretty sight at all!).

I guess she had been trying hard to put on a strong front in the office and pretend like she is ok, but perhaps she really isn't as 'ready' or as 'strong' as she thought she is. Mom wanted to shout at her to say that 'at least your friend is going home with a live, healthy baby, so please freaking stop whingeing and whining'!! Anyway mom is also totally, totally pissed off with that colleague of hers for ripping open her wound AGAIN. Twice is one to many...

Huskee's Mom --- I am sooooooooooooo emotionally and mentally exhausted after this latest episode.... After weeks of trying so hard, I am now back to 'square one'. Felt like someone stabbed me with a knife on my barely healing wound and twisted the knife before removing it. I think this colleague whom I have always treated as a friend really hates me deep down.

I was tagged by Boo Boo to share what can my mom do to make me happy. This is a real tough one... mainly because there are soooooooo many things that can make me a happy... like yummy food, new squeaky toys, belly rubs, etc. (Gee, do you think it's because my expectations are too low?).

After some serious thought, the thing at the top of the list would be this - I want my mom to be happy. If my mom is happy, then I'd be happy too... though it'd be perfect if I can also throw in a new squeaky toy as well... *sheepish grin*...

There's something that I need your views on... I still owe Baby a candlelight din din for her barkday. There are a few locations that I shortlisted, but I just can't decide which one she'd like. So what are your views?

1) At the beach

2) Fine dining restaurant with city view

3) Poolside

Dad bought mom a book from Amazon called 'An Empty Cradle, A Full Heart - Reflections for mothers and fathers after miscarriage, stillbirth or infant death' by Christine O'Keeffe Lafser. The title of the book is so simple, yet meaningful. It's not very thick, only about 250 pages in total and mom finished reading it at one go cos it was so apt (and of cos, she read it through her tears). One particular paragraph stood out - 'Often the people around us can't seem to understand how it could hurt us so badly to lose a baby they think we didn't really know. Since there are no real memories of our little one's life, they have a hard time comprehending the depth of our love and grief. Though they don't mean to hurt us with their attitudes and comments, sometimes their words of comfort sound cruel.' I have previously shared with you about the unwelcome comments/ advice that mom's received from her friends and colleagues, so she could really relate to that paragraph. (Huskee's mom: I JUST got to find out late last week that one of my new colleague who sits near me is 6 months pregnant... I am genuinely happy for her, honestly!! But it really pains me so much to see her baby bump, especially since my Lucas will only be a month younger than her baby if I did not miscarry. Why did her baby get the chance that mine didn't? I find it hard to look at her right now because I'd start to feel so jealous, bitter and sad that I get a lump in my throat and I just want to cry!!!)

I have received so many supportive comments from all of you on my last post, assuring me you'll never 'foresake' us for blogging about all these sadness and unhappiness. I can only say 'THANKS'... Though 'thanks' is just a simple word, but still, it's meant to show your kindness is appreciated more than you can ever know.

Today marks the 'first month anniversary' since mom's miscarriage... Mom went back to work this week and she went into the office real early because she wanted to settle down emotionally before everyone else starts coming in. The first thing that got her crying was the calendar on her desk (yes, she is using a very childish cartoon calendar (*giggle*) and please ignore the messy stuff that she's written all over cos those are her weekly conference call reminders.

If you can see on the left column under 'SUN', she's actually used it to track the week of her pregnancy. It's something that she'd started doing once she found out she was pregnant. So this is 'supposedly' the 18th going on 19th week IF she did not lose the baby. And of course there were other 'reminders' lying around on her desk, like the half eaten bottle of vitamins, the pair of flat sandals under her desk...

After she got through the first day in one piece, the second day was a little better until someone asked her 'Are you pregnant?' She was stumped for a reply... should it be 'Oh yes, I was pregnant but not anymore now. Thank you for asking.' or 'No I am not, but I used to be?!'

In the afternoon, she received a beautiful bouqet of geberas from somepup who is so very thoughtful and sweet. Jay sent this as a surprise to cheer mom up, knowing that she had a tough time on her first day at work. Mom was so touched... And it definitely lifted her spirits! THANK YOU, JAY (and Auntie Julie for paying for Jay's purchase with your ummm.. credit card!! Please don't scold Jay ok?).

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Huskee's mom --- I do apologise if Huskee's blog had been very 'negative' and filled with gloom lately. I would love to be able to go back to 'before' where I can blog about happy stuff. It's just that there really isn't anything fantastic/ good that's happening in our lives nowadays and nothing really worth talking about. Actually, nothing seems to matter anymore...everything seems so mundane and meaningless... There used to be so much to look forward to, i.e. the new house followed by the baby's arrival. Now the house complete but it'd never be called a 'home' cos it is incomplete... Our baby is not there to complete the picture and turn our 'house' into 'home'.

Nowadays, writing the blog has somehow turned into my own 'diary' (oops.. sorry Huskee!!)... It's become very 'theraputic' for me because this is where I feel I can let out my real emotions and where I won't be judged or have to put up with cruel remarks. The only downside is that I could be boring everyone to tears with my sad 'life story'... !! Seriously, I know that no one wants to read a sob story... I'd much rather read something funny and cheery, so I won't blame you if you decide you don't want to visit this blog anymore!

Tomorrow is hubby's birthday. I don't think there'd be any fancy celebrations this year cos we are just not in the mood to celebrate. Also, it just feels so wrong to be 'celebrating' when we've only just lost Lucas. People say that something like a miscarriage can either break a couple up or strengthen the relationship. I don't know what the future holds for us, but I do know that I love him so much and am so grateful to him for being so strong during my weakest moment. I wouldn't know how I could've managed to get to this stage without him.

Special message to Lucas' Daddy -

Happy Birthday to you, Darling...

With lots of love,

Your wife & sons (Huskee Boy & Angel Lucas)

I (ok, my mom) got a lot of very nice gifts recently. Mainly I guess it's because there are a lot of nice friends out there who want to show that they really care during this very sad period.

This bear is from Girl Girl (Auntie Eil), Jay (Auntie Jul) and Bond and Boo Boo (Auntie Jenn). She comes with her very own 'birth certificate' and they have named her 'Beary Miss U'.. Now how sweet is that?!! She has her own little hat and handbag (and the 3 Aunties left 3 pieces of yummy chocolates in the handbag... mom ate ALL of it without offering any to me...). Anyway, I read somewhere that eating chocolates can make you feel happy (and FAT *giggling*), so I'll let her get away with it this time. I'll let you all into a secret... I am planning to steal the cute straw hat from the bear cos I think my wife will look real stylish wearing it.. what do you think?

Then Maggie & Mitch sent ME a surprise pressie... and it's not even my barkday!! THANK YOU Maggie & Mitch and your wonderful mom!! It is a beautiful wood carving and mom is hanging it on the door to her bedroom. Mom says that looking at that CUTE face cheers her up...

THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart... *hugs*

Our very good friends in Australia, Hammer & Family, sent us a beautiful musical ornament (above). It came together with a card and mom was so touched by what Auntie Susan wrote in the card that she 'leaked' while she was reading it. It was happy tears though, not sad ones cos she's touched that Auntie Susan acknowledged the existence of Lucas. To a lot of people that mom spoke with, they don't seem to be able to accept/ acknowledge that Lucas ever existed. Mom also realised that it seem like the people on DWB whom she has never met, appear to understand her pain so much better than some of her 'friends'. She went back to work this morning and immediately, someone came and told her that 'it could be a blessing'... Mom was too stunned to react, but in her head, she was screaming 'you mean it's a blessing that I lost my baby??!'...

Then again, mom realises that the mouth belongs to other people, so they can say whatever they want. You really have no control over 'verbal garbage'... other than to get upset!! Just like a very recent incident where mom read somewhere that another dog owner had insinuated that only purebreed Maltese can be well-behaved (??!).. I reckon this implied that crossbreed dogs are not well-behaved??! Being a crossbreed myself (Maltese X Shih Tzu), I can't help but to feel sad and disappointed that this type of comment came from a fellow dog owner. I guess everyone who genuinely loves their pets wouldn't give a woof whether their 4-legged friends are purebreed or not. This comment not only insulted me, but all my crossbreed friends out there. The writer stepped on quite a number of tails (no pun intended) with that remark. I AM A CROSSBREED AND I AM PROUD OF IT! --- You are of course entitled to your own myopic, bigoted, shallow opinion, so I am entitled to mine too.

Oops, sorry, I digressed... I must admit that I got carried away there.. Hammer also sent me a toy that I tell you can squeak real loud! Mom didn't manage to get any pictures of me with it cos I was playing 'catch me if you can' with her while she was chasing me around with the camera!

Mom's message to Auntie Susan - Dearest Susan, Of course I do not 'mind' it one bit.. In fact, Mark and I love it so much because 'Waltzing Mathilda' brought back so many beautiful memories of our time in Australia. I can safely say that those 4 years have been the most memorable ones in my life. That's a tune that Mark and I both know and love... (fyi, Mark was humming it the whole night long!! And I do mean the whole night... *sheepish grin*). So THANK YOU Susan, for the beautiful card and precious gift. It brought back many cherished memories for us and I am sure Lucas loves this tune too cos it means so much to his Daddy and Mommy...

How's every pup doing? Hope that you've all got a wonderful weekend, especially for my friends over in the US who celebrated 4th July. I bet the fireworks must be lovely. My mom always loved fireworks and thinks that they are very romantic (??!!). I hope my Baby does not think that fireworks are romantic cos I am terrified of them... *shudders*...

Mom is still at home this week. Her medical leave officially ended last Fri but her boss suggested that she work from home and only return back to the office when she feels that she is ready. Physically she feels fine... but emotionally, I guess it'd take a while.

Over the past week, mom's received some comments from her 'friends' that made her so sad... (I feel like biting the bum bum of those people who made the comments!!). One of them told her that 'the mourning period is over' and that it's time she 'faces reality'. Pawsonally mom feels that she does not need to account to anyone other than to herself and to dad, about how long she takes to grieve. She's already faced the reality that she lost her baby, I mean how else can you account for the fact that the pregnancy symptoms are mostly gone and her used to be pregnant womb now lies empty?? Moreover, it's been only 3 weeks since she lost her firstborn... that is a very much wanted and loved baby, so is that really 'too long' a time to grieve??

The other comment she received was 'it's ok, you are still young, you can try again'... it's like 'hello??'... that baby is a LIFE. It's not about trying again... the next baby will be another life. He/ she will not and cannot replace the one that was lost. Probably a miscarriage is not treated as a form of death by most people. To them, it could be more like a medical condition which you can recover from... like flu??

Things were just begining to improve a little bit over here but after getting those comments, mom felt as though someone ripped open her wounds all over again...

Mom's learnt something from this... When you don't know what to say, it's best not to say anything at all... maybe just let the person know that you care and will be there for him/ her if needed, but not offering so-called 'advice' when it hurts the person even more.

*sigh*

Hello everyone... Just wanted to let you know that we are fine. Mom's still 'leaking' a bit, especially if she sees a baby or when she sees/ hears something that will trigger the 'tap'. But on the whole, she is slowly accepting the loss and trying to move on with her life.

She's also been trying to keep herself busy by doing up the new house. (From my acute observation, she's not really 'doing up' anything.. she's just unpacking cartons and cartons and cartons of her clothes, bags, accessories and shoes!! You'll be amazed the amount of stuff she has!!) Poor Dad's been trying his best to 'guard' the limited cupboard space he has before her stuff 'invades' into his territory as well.

Most of the furniture has arrived and all of the cartons have been unpacked. So to keep her busy for a longer time, I have taken it upon myself to pee all over the house. *defensively* Hey, so long as it keeps her busy, right??! RIGHT?? The next thing she wants to try to do is read up all the manuals for the appliances ('cos all the appliances are new). The washing machine for one, has been making the weirdest noise when she tried to use it the first time... (and the silly woman forgot to separate 2 new BLACK towels she just bought, so the entire load of clothes were discoloured... the lighter ones ended up in various shades of grey to be exact).

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Huskee's Mama (Shane) here - I just want to say THANK YOU to all the lovely people who have left so many words of encouragement and support. Honestly, just a simple 'thank you' is not suffcient to express my gratitude... At the darkest point of my life, you have shown me a ray of light and it really helps to know that there are so many people who cares about us and Baby Lucas.

I have always known that DWB is a great community where there are loads of lovely people with their furry friends, but this incident really showed me just how wonderful all of you really are.

• Greg, Brooke, Opy and Charlie: Thank you for creating this little piece of Heaven called Dogs with Blogs... (And special thanks to Brooke for your lovely email)

• Helios' M and MM, Jack & Joey and their HC, Tommy and his parents: Thank you for the lovely flowers and teddy bear. I have given the teddy to Lucas and it is his very first (and only) toy. Teddy is now sitting proudly in the room that is supposed to belong Lucas.

• Boy and Baby's mom (Mas): Thank you for simply being there and for listening without judging

• Boo Boo (J), Girl Girl (Eil) and Jay (Jul): Thank you for the very cute teddy and lovely card... She certainly brightened up my day!

• Angel Lacy Lulu, Bear, Rocky and their mama Claudette: Thanks for checking on us to make sure we are ok...

• Scuba and his mom (Viv): For checking on me everyday without fail and for your love, support and patience.

To be honest, I am still looking for the 'closure' that I have been seeking cos I know I need to move on with my life and let my angel go to where he belongs. But it really is easier said than done. There is still a lot of bottled up questions, frustrations, guilt and anger... and now I am begining to question myself if there is something wrong with me for not 'getting over it'. Maybe the reason is because deep down, I don't want to 'get over it'... I don't want my baby to be forgotten.