Tuesday, September 2, 2008

I am still trying to come to terms with T-man's passing. I find it hard to believe that he's gone to the Rainbow Bridge so suddenly. And I feel for his mom... she must be going through a very hard time now. I wish there's something I can do to cheer her up a little, even if it's just for a while. *sigh*

Mom was very understanding and gave me lots of ear rubs and belly rubs to cheer me up. While I did appreciate her effort, it did not really help.

Huskee's mom:
Sorry, I have 'hijacked' Huskee's blog again... I have consiously made an effort to try to stop talking/ writing about Lucas because I guess people will get tired of listening to me. However, I really couldn't help it here because for me, T-man's passing really brought back the memories of how painful it is to lose someone you love.

In my daily life, I have stopped wallowing in self-pity (as some people will put it) and stopped talking about Lucas altogether... like some people will say, I am 'getting my act together'. I am crying a lot lesser... and I have even achieved the feat of holding Mark's one year old nephew without breaking down. However, it doesn't mean that I am 'back to normal'... it just proves that I am getting better at hiding my emotions.. and that I can control myself a lot better now. One thing I can confirm is that I am definitely not a 'mental case' like what I initally thought!

I came across this poem when we lost Lucas, I felt that it was so meaningful and exactly described how I was feeling. Reading it again still makes me teary and I have shared it with T-man's mom. She must be going through such a rough time now and I wish there's something I can do...

They say memories are golden,
well maybe that is true.
I never wanted memories,
I only wanted you.

A million times I needed you,
a million times I cried.
If love alone could have saved you,
You never would have died.

In life I loved you dearly,
In death I love you still.
In my heart you hold a place
No one could ever fill.

If tears could build a stairway
And heartache make a lane,
I'd walk the path to heaven
And bring you back again.

Our family chain is broken,
And nothing seems the same.
But as God calls us one by one,
The chain will link again.

Can't wait for the 'link' to be complete...


Lorenza said...

Hi, Huskee and Mom!
That poem is beautiful. My mom cried reading it. Thanks for sharing.
Kisses and hugs

Deefor said...

That is very sad and beautiful. You shouldn't have to stop talking about Lucas. Ever. Or having feelings. Or remembering.

Deefor (and Mom)

BWTH Dog House said...

Huskee, Im still in shocked & I miss T-man.

Auntie S, that's a sad but beautiful poem. I dont know what to say so I give you extra slurpy licks.


Asta said...

Pleez tell youw Mom tat we will nevew tiwe of Lucas ow hew talking about him..he's hew baby boy and always will be, and like that bootiful poem says..someday the chain will be whole again..she will hold hew little Angel Lucas. Meantime she holds him in hew heawt, and should nevew hide that!
I send you and youw family all my love and smoochie kisses to help make the sadness less
ASTAand Mommi

Lacy said...

w00f's Huskee and all, thats a bute ti ful poem....and no we will never get tired of hearing u...we always do what we have to do, doesnt matter how hard it is, or how much ur heart is breaking....its what must b done, to keep our sanity....

b safe,

pps and ur still in my thoughts and prayers....

Simba said...

Things like that always bring back feelings we try and cover up. We are sending you hugs.

Simba x

the 4 Bs said...

hi Huskee and mom, we have been so sad about losing T-Man also. he was one of our bestest buddies and one of our first friends on DWB.

that was a nice poem. we will remember that.


Deetz said...

I loved that poem. Thanks for sharing. I never got the chance to meet T-man. I think you should be able to talk about whatever you want and whomever you want, whenever you want too...and if you ever get any nasty grams, you just let me know or my mum, cuz she will kick their butt. Daddy says she is a redneck, personally I don't see a red neck. I am sorry you are sad. How is Hershey? All boxed up and ready to go?? umm umm

Ms. _____ 2 be ! said...

Always have him in your heart!
hugs and kisses from Pearly!

Dana & Elmo said...

That is a beautiful poem. I have never met T-man before, and I'm very sure he was a wonderful doggy from all the love he's receiving, and I know that you will be very appreciated for sharing this beautiful poem.


Lady Kaos said...

That's a nice poem. Don't stop talking to us about Lucas just because you think we're tired of hearing about him. We're here for you for those types of situations. if you need to vent, need someone to say woohoo or need a virtual hug, then let us know!

Mango the Maltese kiddo said...

I've joined DWB for about 2 months now. My little heart beats the same pace with every doggies, I feel sad and happy with every news we share.
Can I borrow the poem for my mom, it's a perfect comfort for her. She lost my brother maltese Ringo last year. She cried alone for months until she found me.
Please tell your mom do not stop talking about Lucas, we're listening and never grow tired of it. Oh I forgot to tell you the other night, she went to your blog, read and read far far back, her tears dropped on the keyboard when she read what your mom wrote about pregnancy then Lucas went to heaven. Hugs and kisses to both of you, and Hershey too.

Moco said...

What a lovely poem. It made Grammie teary eyed. You are working through the grief process, but never feel that you have to explain yourself. You are allowed to feel anyway you desire for any length of time that you need. No one knows your pain but you and if they can't except you and your feelings that is their dysfunction.

-The Mullin Clan's Mommy- said...

Hi Huskee & Mom,

That poem is really bewootiful! R Mommy got tears in her eyes while reading it.

-Cosmos & Juneau-

Joe Stains said...

What a beautiful poem. Take all the time you need and if you don't want to stop talking about Lucus, DONT!

Huskee, we get pumpkin every other day, then usually banananana on the days we don't get pumpkin!

Scottie the 'cutie' said...

Hi Huskee,

That is a very beautiful poem. Thanks for sharing it. And please tell your Mom that it is okay to talk about Lucas whenever she wants to. If it helps with some part of healing, my Mom and I are all ears for her...


T-man's mom said...

Huskee and Mom Shane,
That is the most beautiful made me cry a lot because it really tells the truth of what it feels like to lose a loved one.

I know that sad memories will keep coming up when you are reminded of them. I think your pain must be so much harder because you didn't have the chance to create those happy memories with Lucas. But I'm hoping he'll find his way back to you somehow, some way. Just keep loving him and he will stay close to your heart.

T-man's mom, CC-man and T-man Angel

happy said...

Hi Huskee and Mom,

That's a really sad and beautiful poem. We're sad to hear about T-Man too although we never get the chance to know him.

Hope you'll feel better in time to come. No matter how hard and painful it is at this point, hope you'll take comfort in knowing that you'll always have people around you who cares and loves you. Keeping you in our thoughts.

Jan's Funny Farm said...

The poem is beautiful. You're allowed to grieve. No one can tell you what is an appropriate time frame or how to handle your grief.

We're glad you enjoyed Mr. Nekkid Cold Box's story. We thought you might like to know Jan put a note out for Randy the mailman yesterday with the blog address on it so he can "meet" the appliance he delivered so much mail to. :)

Hammer said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
BWTH Dog House said...

aiyo Huskee, you change your layout. I thought I went to the wrong blog. wakakakkaka!!! where is your chatbox??

slurpy licks,


What a beautiful poem!

We also are saddened by the news of T-man crossing the bridge.

And we think it's okay to talk about Lucas as much or as often as you want.

Take care!

Woofs Casper, Buddy, Nikki, and Momma